I was right. With a little perspective, and time, and a little crying jag, yesterday morning actually wasn't so bad. Gotta love those hormones.
Can I also blame the hormones for the incredibly vivid dreams I've been having? At least once a week for the past few months, I've had dreams that seem so realistic. Maybe realistic isn't the right word, though, because it's certainly nothing that would ever happen in real life.
Last night I was back in high school and Mark, the guy I was completely in love with actually wanted to be with me (awesome!), but things were just a little off. For one thing, we slept together (as in really sleeping, nothing else), but I wouldn't have even done that, especially not in my house with my mom sleeping down the hall. Then when we woke up in the morning he wanted to tell Mom he slept there and that he wanted to marry me, and even though we didn't have sex I was very worried about getting pregnant...then I remembered that I already was and was relieved. Then I got mad at Mark for something and stole his care and drove to school. Somehow I managed to drive onto the median. Mark appeared and moved the car into a parking spot, but he did it with his hands. He literally picked the car up and put it down in the parking spot. Twilight, much? Well, yeah, turns out Mark was a vampire. I came to terms with that and then woke up.
The night before last Michael's mom was coming at me with a knife and yelling at me for not being Indian. I tried to remind her that she had another son to marry off to a proper Indian girl and she shouldn't worry about Michael because he didn't really want to bring his children up in the Indian culture anyway. Then she started chasing me and saying she was going to kill me, so I ran to our neighbor's house and he let me inside and called 911. I actually remember the conversation I had with the 911 operator, and feeling relief when I heard the sirens outside the house before she managed to break in.
Of course, I wasn't ever pregnant in high school, Mark was not a vampire, Michael and his family are not Indian, and I assume his mother doesn't actually want to kill me (thought I suspect she's not happy about me being Catholic and Michael converting, so that dream may have come from that).
And those were just the dreams from this week. I've had three of these really vivid dreams before, two of which used to be repetetive, but I haven't had them in a few years. So, three in my whole life, and now I'm having them at least once a week. I hope it stops after Wesley is born. I'm starting to be a little paranoid about how much I'm dreaming about Mark, though most of the time it's really Michael it just looks like Mark. It's still really wierd, and I hope it's the hormones.